Filling The Void

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Maria DiGiorgio is a lifelong New Yorker, who currently resides in Commack, with her family.  She is a devoted wife and mother, an educator and designer. Maria
is active in her community, as a PTA mom and Girl Scout leader.  She has a passion for interior decorating and loves to garden. She is an avid reader, and enjoys writing about life experiences and parenthood, as well as her personal observations about the world around us.

Each one of us has things we wish to do, places we wish to visit, and goals we wish to accomplish. For many, these aspirations come to fruition; for many more, they do not.  There is always something we have yet to achieve and as such, this can present a void in our lives.  The void is representative of a need or desire that seems to be elusive in satisfying.  We may not be able to fill this need or desire in the intended way, and therefore, seek to fill it through alternative means.  
    Replacing the intended outcome with a substitution can prove to be not only unsatisfying, but also problematic in a host of ways.  People often turn to food, shopping, drinking, smoking or any other number of things, in order to fill this void. If we’ve struggled to fill a void in vain, we can become disillusioned, disheartened and distressed.  It is important to become aware of behaviors we engage in, in a mindless or automatic fashion.  We need to determine if we are trying to avoid a sense of failure or escape feelings of frustration.  We need to ask ourselves if our behaviors, habits or responses are appropriate, meaningful and essential to meeting our goals, and thereby filling the void we may be dealing with.
     Another strategy we can employ is to re-evaluate our goal(s).  Perhaps our expectations are not realistic.  Perhaps, our desires or priorities have shifted, and we no longer truly want or need whatever it is we had set our minds and hearts to, previously.  Taking time to check in with ourselves and ask some direct, honest and heartfelt questions is a practice we should regularly embrace.  We cannot rely on other people or circumstances to create feelings of satisfaction, in our lives  Yes, other people and circumstances can and do play a role in our happiness and fulfillment, but they should not be the only factors.  True happiness is a decision we each make, in order to achieve.  It is not always the picture-perfect “Hallmark” moment.  In fact, it seldom is.  It is often imperfect, unexpected and unrehearsed.  In little moments, in bits and pieces, over time, we cultivate a sense of fulfillment and genuine joy, in our lives.  True happiness is not achieved in one fell swoop, but rather, in countless experiences, over a lifetime.  
     Take time to “smell the roses” and even, to appreciate the more than occasional “thorns” life presents each one of us with.  I promise, all these things will add up to a fullness of spirit you may never have experienced, before!